Learn how to be optimistic. Basically, you aren’t required to be born a positive person – optimism can be learned. Don’t give up just because you’re not good at it! Because there’s a way to…
Learn how to be optimistic.
But how, you ask?
If I’m being candid with you, (and my husband, Rob, can attest to this,) compared to some others, I am not naturally a positive person.
*gasp*
Did I really say that?
Yes, I did. I’m a learned optimist.
It’s deliberate.
It’s a choice.
I believe anyone can learn how to be optimistic, and with deliberation, choose to act that way.
If so, then all of us can take action in a strategically positive way.
In all areas of our lives:
in how we think about ourselves,
as we talk to ourselves (our inner dialogue),
how we make choices in our life,
when we interact with people,
in our business world, church world, and family,
as we pursue our side-hustle, our hobbies,
and/or entrepreneurial life,
while setting and embracing our goals – large or small
and everything else life holds!
Here’s the path – with 4 aspects – on how to learn to be optimistic:
1 – Begin with love.
Start by feeling love for yourself. (Yes, it’s a journey.)
Firstly, I believe I was born on purpose and for a purpose. As were you! No person is an accident. Everyone has value.
For all those mothers who long to get pregnant, and parents who are trying and trying to conceive a child, this concept of a child being born on purpose is real. (As is the heart-wrench and ache when a child dies before you can hold her or him in your arms.)
Plus, as a Christian, I believe God loves me. He loves you. There’s a plan for us. As a great example of true, perfect love, Jesus, the Son of God, gave up His life in a horrible death for no reason other than He loved me. And you. And everyone. All people. Regardless. (If you’re looking for a romance story, the Bible is the ultimate one.)
Maybe your life thus far hasn’t shown you much love. If that’s the case, I just want to tell you:
It’s not the end of the story!
You can feel loved. There’s time.
Just as you have time to love others. It’s a journey.
Gratitude is so much more important than the world around you wants you to believe. Being thankful is a special sauce, a magic formula, the ultimate elixir on the way to being positive.
How do you track your thankfulness?
Being aware of what you’re thankful for is one thing. Because of this, it’s powerful when you see all the items concretely logged with writing or images.
Whether you use an app, a journal, a planner or a plain old notebook, keeping an ongoing list of all the items you’re thankful for on a daily basis is important!
Important!
Did you hear that?
I can’t think of another way to state it. Make it a habit at the beginning, middle or end of a day to list what you’re thankful for. Begin recording your thankfulness.
I challenge you to start with a list of 100 items. A while ago Rob and I did an exercise like this together and it was so much easier than it seems… From this, we realized that the greatest to the least little item provides many, many reasons each day to give thanks.
” Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.”
Therefore, you can learn how to be optimistic if you use gratitude as a tool!
So, being loved and being thankful. Right.
And after that – what’s next?
3 – Being encouraged and encouraging others helps you to learn how to optimistic.
Thirdly, what is encouragement?
“Encouragement: words or actions that give someone confidence or hope and words or actions that help something to happen.”
~ from MacMillan Dictionary
To learn how to be optimistic means you understand the importance of encouragement. Encouragement is an action. It’s having hope for the future. People who are positive-focused know how to help themselves and others make something happen – something good for the future.
Optimists are confident that if they keep trying and continue to persevere, regardless, there will be an improvement.
And once an optimist is feeling hopeful, then…
4 – Optimists take action.
Lastly, some of the skills on the path to learn how to be optimistic are the ability to make a plan, work the plan and take action on the goals that’ll get you to the finish line of the plan. Does this sound familiar?
What if things don’t work out? Failure is part of the plan – it’s gonna happen, and optimists who take action have contingencies at hand to fail forward.
So, if something doesn’t work out, the optimist finds another way.
Above all, it’s about taking action – not getting stuck in inertia or analysis paralysis. Equally, if a positive person does get stuck, they look for help from another encouraging person! Do you have someone like that in your life?
Are you someone who takes action? Is there a chance you’re also a learned optimist?
Being Positive on Purpose
All in all, life isn’t always what you expect. There are curveballs…
It’s important to realize there are days, weeks and even years where being optimistic is hard. At times it feels almost impossible. I get it. I really do – due to circumstances we all encounter, I’ve experienced it and it’s difficult to be optimistic when in crisis. (Especially if others around you expect optimism from you and you’re feeling like you’re running on empty.)
What can you do when it’s hard to be optimistic?
Actively seek support. To clarify, surround yourself with people, activities, and resources which will support you in practicing:
loving yourself and others,
being thankful – in all circumstances,
accepting encouragement and giving encouragement,
and taking action.
To be transparent – that’s why this site was born. I needed something to keep my focus on remaining and then growing in being positive. So, that’s what PostiveThanksLiving.com is for… it’s for me and you!
On the positive side, there’s no end in learning to be optimistic.
You just get better at it. Certainly, it takes ongoing practice, but the benefits of practicing optimism impact everyone around you for the better.
Indeed, it’s not going to hurt anyone if you learn how to be optimistic… in fact, it’ll help make the world around you a little better!
If so, it’s important to be flexible, and stay positive and thankful because big goals take many turns.
Some are a gentle arc, and barely noticed. Those turns are easy.
Other turns are like the Tail of the Dragon – 11-miles of twists in Tennesee that car and motorbike aficionados use to challenge their driving skill. Sometimes a challenge can be exhilarating.
Regardless of the severity of the turn or turns on the way to that big goal, what thinking skills do you need to navigate your way? These intangible skills will work for the easy turns and the challenging ones alike. And along the way to your goal you’re going to need these skills!
Navigating the turns in Big Goals
Traveling with our 5th-Wheel up and down the coast, into big cities and across expanses, required many different skills compared to zooming in a little car to the store.
Rob often talked about thinking in 3 dimensions – not just length and width, but also height as we navigated through our RV-ing adventures.
Big Goals also need a different style of thinking from everyday duties.
Here are some I’ve practiced and seen others do along the way to a big goal.
Clarity. What do you really want? If you know what you really want, then at every turn you’ll be able to choose the way forward.
Focus. Make a plan to get to your goal that includes all the turns you can imagine. Follow the plan.
Review. Goals need a plan and those huge goals are probably made up of many smaller plans and goals. Review it all regularly, because there are going to be turns you haven’t anticipated on the way to the win.
Flexibility. Be ready to shift. You may be in 1st and 2nd gear for a long haul before you get to that open road where you can let all the power out!
Thankfulness. No matter what turn you hit, be aware of the good stuff and express your thankfulness.
and finally…
Stay optimistic.
Optimism is going to be the overarching need, regardless of all the different skills when navigating the turns in a Big Goal.
Have you encountered a turn on the way to a big goal? What did you do to navigate that unexpected shift?
Making a Plan…
Plans and goals go hand-in-hand. Rarely will someone reach a goal without one. So, how do you record your plan? How do you keep track?
I currently use notebooks – just the dollar-store kind – to keep track of what I’m working on. I even decorate the cover because I’m playing with paper these days. But I have tried other planners. Some just had the months and weeks listed. They worked just fine. And then on my way to seeking a change, I used this planner for 100 days. (I wrote about it here.)
Planning for a bigger goal requires some reflection. (The kind of thinking included in the above 5 ways.)
I found what I needed to do some reflective thinking with the Happiness line of planners. If you’re interested in what I’m speaking about, there are downloadable printables to do some reflecting and planning. Click here to see – they’re free!
If you wanted an undated planner for 365 days, take a look at this one. (Why undated? Because it’s rare that we start a big goal at the obvious beginning of a year. Life usually isn’t that simple.) This kind of planner is much more – it’ll work toward getting you from where you currently are to your big goal. If you want to, download a free PDF of a page of its style to see if this planner will work for you.
No matter what you choose – notebook, regular dated planner, or something else – your Big Goal will need some way to capture all the twists and turns. I urge you to take the thinking actions first!
What an insightful quote from an amazing woman! I think we all can agree that Helen Keller’s ability to achieve, regardless of the social era and her physical challenges, is startling.
she was the first blind and deaf person to earn a bachelors degree in 1904
authored 12 books, an autobiography, and numerous articles
Find your optimism for what you need to achieve – and your hope and confidence will follow!
Achieving a goal.
I’m working on a goal. Am I confident I’ll achieve it? Hmm… I do hope so! Over the next 30 days (April 2019) I’m participating in a writing challenge and if I look at all Helen Keller achieved, I have no excuse whatsoever! So, I’ll adopt her attitude and begin.
Who inspires you?
Perhaps a mentor? Or a historical persona? Do you have people you’d like to emulate?
Leave a comment – let’s inspire each other!
Need more encouragement for achieving a goal? Below are few articles to prompt some optimism – click the links on the images.
Be thankful for the one. One step forward, one page written, one child encouraged, one heart strengthened, one person eating well, one bed made, one load of laundry folded, one desire fulfilled, one prayer answered, one smile, one…
Never underestimate the one thing.
Every book began with a page of writing, and every blog began with that first post. A relationship begins with a smile between two people. The knowledgable person began their journey with one item of information. New forests begin with one tree. (I was reminded by this post.) Revolutionary technology begins with an idea. Each business starts with one client.
One. It could be the start of something big!
I’m encouraging you to be thankful for one thing – that first item, or the next one thing on your list. Why? Because it has value. (And yes, I’m talking to myself also.)
It’s so easy to gloss over what you’ve already accomplished because you’re desperately focused on all you have yet to add to your resume.
All success starts with one. One step. One client. One order. One sale. While dreams of greatness are great, we must remember to appreciate the joy of the start.
One way to appreciate the “joy of the start” is by being thankful.
Be thankful for the one thing.
I challenge you to write down what you’re thankful for – today. The one thing. Just one thing. What one action have you taken that holds value? (And value is subjective – you decide.) Here are some ideas on how to record it:
Maybe you already do this “being thankful” in some form?
If so… YAY you! Leave a comment on how you’ve developed being thankful – where do you record it? Do you add those items that you’re accomplishing?
Or leave a comment on what your ONE thing is that you’re thankful for doing today!
Let’s all celebrate – together – taking one action to move forward.
… and then record it again tomorrow.
And the day after.
Consistently.
Until your microwave is filled with sticky notes or your app has 365 notations, or you can’t see yourself in the bathroom mirror anymore because it’s so full of those “one” actions!
It’s not too late. You’re enough. You’ve done enough preparation.
Begin.
(I’m cheering you on!)
Remind yourself – click HERE to download the wallpaper photo below for your smartphone.
I’ve been reading this book… and that’s what has prompted today’s post. Our inner dialogue impacts what we begin and finish. One of Neil Fiore’s suggesions when you find yourself overwhelmed by a task, perhaps feeling unequal to all the effort it’ll take, is to work on the project for a half hour, and then record on your calendar your progress. It’s part of taking credit for the work you’ve done. You’re proving to yourself that you can.
Be prompted to be positive via email- to remind you that you're loved, to be thankful, of encouraging and to be encouraged and of setting and achieving goals. That's Positive ThanksLiving!
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